So the identity of my abusive weekend mystery caller has been revealed, what can I say? Oh, demon alcohol.

Here's the thing- say I say something like 'I love you all!' Sure, maybe it seems a little ironic or tongue in cheek or something, but mostly, if you have any reason to believe I might actually mean it, I almost certainly do. If you imagine I have a patronizing attitude toward you and you're someone I actually talk to, & you'll just have to trust me on this, I don't. If I seem flip or condescending, I'm probably just trying to be funny & not succeeding very well. I find being myself more of a pain in the ass than it's worth, but there's nothing I can do about it. I imagine I can be very irritating, but if you all could cut me some slack and assume I'm trying to be nice that would be great because I'm genuinely very fond of you.

OK, back to work.