Sunday, November 12, 2006

I guess I've always, or for a very long time anyway, thought of myself as a fairly dark person. Some of the things I've been doing and thinking lately have left me with the impression that I'm a lot darker than that, that one could peel back layers, each darker than the next and finally be left with a glowing black point, vibrating slightly. The seemingly endless repetition of pain & slaughter everywhere, as a not-too-noteworthy side effect, makes sweet, sensitive little boys into monsters- empty of everything but hate, vicious.

Having some tea with honey, attempting to return to human form, it hurts. Peretz is curled up in a ball nearby.

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