Big voice: I have spoke my verse with what skill I could hone through long years in yonder hills, did it please you?

A million tiny voices (buzzing): It did not, for what it lacked in diversion and charm it made up for only with gracelessness and banality, and now we shall devour you.

Big voice: Crap.

Fatigue is really something, how many frequencies do you think it's possible to vibrate at at once? Fixing highly spiced green curry with tiny summer squash, green beans, carrots, etc. Green beans are a pain to cook when impatient to be asleep.

Spent an uncannily long time at work today looking for an errant cd, I'm a highly skilled professional.

Went to show at Bookmill, left a bit early as headache and extremely hot room weren't mixing too well, shame, was having fun, need to go to work early anyway. Ran into Dane I'll be working with tomorrow at record shop earlier, good thing, too, as he didn't know who to ask for at the paper, when to come, etc. Typical of this whole business. Should be asleep, but headache says no, tomorrow will probably collapse with aneurysm while slaving over hot server & then you'll be sorry.

So feeling pretty sorry for myself, don't like pain, would write myself an ode or something but the muses split with some cool guy, said not to wait up.

Headache is hanging in there, played some guitar anyway, now working on cataloging songs with no info that people gave me, don't tell me, don't tell me, I know it's wrong.

Just picked up 'The Essential Fripp & Eno' in town, listening to 'The Heavenly Music Corporation' for the first time in who knows how long, used to have a cassette of 'No Pussyfooting' in college that I was really into listening to on my walkman, remember a particularly intense experience listening to 'Swastika Girls' & reading 'Suspiria de Profundis'- oh, hell, now I want to be watching Argento movies. The amount of beauty in the world is difficult to overstate.

Was thinking of spending the hot afternoon hiding in my air conditioned hidey hole, but somehow the outside beckons, an horchata would be nice, for instance. Taking the dog for a long walk before work this morning was a mistake, transition from extreme hot sweatiness to 68 degree server room left me with a wicked headache- pills, coffee & a shower are slowly sorting that out, right eyelid still twitching.

For some reason my mind is alive with business ventures, really, what the fuck?

Abrupt dishevelment and its reversal, dramatic ends achieved by technologies of time dispersal and congealment, in short, our conception, in itself banal, reveals multitudes, in relation to what it is not. The only thing shameful about the indigence of art, at the present time, is how it conceals itself, sometimes in the tiny folds around your eyes. The scent of mint, adrift on the wind, your name whispered by a ghost born of sleepless nights, a host of other things with no names- so you do what you can do and what happens will. The canals of your ear, invisible underground chambers, packed to the gills with secret machinery, sometimes quiet and slow, but always producing. Thanks for that.

At some point, need to figure out how to arrange my life such that I can enjoy more evening coffee, its magic transcends description, floating along on a cloud of private joy, hi down there. Was just out walking around trying to write in my head, fragments, gibberish, not the day for it, I guess. Was thinking about what a funny word 'pert' is, a cloud of senses not quite congealing in my head which nonetheless seem to refer to some single entity which I would be interested in getting to know better, I remember hearing the word 'foxy' in some old r&b song once and feeling that the singer had something much more definite in mind than I would, his delivery of the word splashing against my ear like a warm raindrop pregnant with the future, a world alive with sinuous, untrustworthy forms- they're looking at me.

A children's song I've been working on:

We fuck what we kill & we kill what we fuck
We want your vote in November cause we've got the right stuff
We're killfuckers, killfuckers

You get the idea, maybe you can write the rest before they get you.

Ah, 'One Piece' is on now, ridiculous 'rap' theme song reminds me of my childhood obsession with 'Going Berserk'. Everybody going berserk, going berserk, going berserk. Funny was just discussing Vikings earlier.

Just took Petya on a tour of quality valley shoppes so he could get bday cake & liquor & c. for upstate NY partying Russian style, I'm currently enjoying extravagantly sugary Indian confections & bing cherries, am experimenting with freezing Old Krupnik, will soon be much sweeter than you expect, diabetic or both, looking forward to a quiet night in, I think.

Slow day, quite a change, head still racing in perpetual panic state, the tribe must survive &, as usual, it's down to me, working out a root/berry gathering schedule, going through my references for appropriate rituals, watching the skies.

Neil's new house- just beautiful. Moving giant quantities of boxes there not so much.

Final TK show seemed very final, but nice, cool stuff, groovy tunes, nice folks, sniffle... oh well, no big deal, plenty worse to cry about & I will.

Wondering if I could spend every day this busy & survive, might give it a try.

About to go help some pals move, just started pouring, happy sysadmin appreciation day.

While walking P in sunshower a little while ago, young woman in slinky dress borrowed my leopard print lighter to singe the tips of her rainbow ribbon pin, hard to do with all the gusts. She gave me a little pink flyer for "OutSpoken: 'You Said What?!' A poetry slam to celebrate the release of 'The Q Files' a 'zine for queer youth activists" tonight at 7-9:30 in the Maplewood Shops, does that mean she likes me?

OK, off to tote & lift.

So, Polish Delicatessen in Enfield is indeed the home of the Pierogi Queen, huzzah! Also found some interesting info about Virginia Dare Korker, some of which I'm drinking right now. Word on the street is that Harmony Springs might be coming up for sale, considering buying it, commie water activists be damned.

It's the humidity- bread loaves moldy after 2 days, no long walks = trapped inside my head, short walks with Peretz = sticky, itchy, icky. Sick of it, heading north, nice knowing you.

OK, so not really. Sticking with you, cause I'm made out of glue. At least it feels like it.

Very difficult to get any serious philosophizing done in this oppressive atmosphere, 'An Invitation to the Reinvigoration of Fundamental Schemata' may need to wait till the Fall, but then the harvest festivals will be calling. The intersection of five major sign systems isn't a very restful place, not complaining, mind. In the meantime, I've been roaming the Firmament in search of portents, doesn't look too good, I'm afraid, for any of us. My prescription- old-timey movies & strong drink. Typically, I've been subsisting on BBC mysteries & soda pop, no wonder I feel out of sorts.

Also drank about a quart of aronia berry juice earlier, think it may have made me a bit aronic, should pass soon.

While on the subject of secret signs & Santas (sorry if I frighten, my dyslexic friends), go see the last ever art show at Gallery TK in downtown Northampton tomorrow evening, 'Christmas is the new black', 8-11, video at 8:30, undoubtedly universally accessible dance music after, hurrah!- here's the advert:



After all that, I have a plan involving cartoon bunnies drawn with sidewalk chalk & necromancy if anyone's interested.

Found wandering countryside in a dazed state due to demands of work, subject is responding poorly to treatment, looks off into the distance, mumbles indistinctly about the little people.

Anybody want some baby bok choy?

Had a dream involving a room with 4 brightly colored toilets in it, 3 along one wall, one on a shorter adjoining wall. They all had removable grilles between seat and water. For some reason it makes me think of the children's punishment room at Jonestown.

On a related subject, anybody gotten organized yet to illegally take minors across state lines to get abortions without parental consent? Count me in, anyway. Maybe we should start a Myspace page.

Watching 'Wolf Creek' with T, annoying camera angles, somewhat suspenseful, our heroes are currently stuck by Wolf Creek Crater with their car battery mysteriously dead, lights are coming this way.

Spent most of the day as a computer configuration factory, bleary eyed.

Blueberry pierogies aren't as good as strawberry, still pretty darn good.

Woken up in the middle of the night with muscle cramp in foot, having trouble getting my head around the coming day. Going into work early to service difficult client, just want to be playing my new guitar.

Despite my misgivings about saying so, everybody should go check out Jack Rose at GalleryTK tomorrow night as it should be quite good & is their last music show ever, please don't not go just because I say to.

Just went to check out 'Horse' show at TK, mostly because Jess had described it to me as 'a bunch of stuff by pet painters.' And how. The horse ladies had shoved their coolers up against some of Jess's drawings, the wine helps them forget the smell of rotting meat that follows them around. Glanced at some children's novels from the Morgan Horse series, dig on the softcore horse porn.

Now that I've digested my dinner, enjoying a rising wave of pure hostility, come on, let's fuck shit up.

El Guranaco has once again turned my frustrated rage against the murderous stupidity everywhere to a mellow feeling of good will to all, also managed to find some blueberry pierogies at Food Fair in Chicopee, may soon go investigate the mysterious Polish Delicatessen/Pierogi Queen in Enfield from which these fruit pierogies appear to emanate. I like shiny objects and can be easily tricked with them into giving up things of great value, won't you come visit my island?